Are adult diapers better than wetting your pants?

I am 28 years old. I have recently been diagnosed with an overactive bladder. I’ve been having accidents in my pants for about 6 months now and recently started wearing diapers. I feel just as embarrassed about wearing the diapers as i did with wetting my pants. Ive been considering going back to regular underwear again. What should I do?

Please ignore all the snide answers — you have a genuine medical condition and it is nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed about, any more than if you needed to wear glasses, use an inhaler, or anything else. As to what is “better”, that really depends on your situation and what you are comfortable with. Are you having accidents every day or just on occasion? Have you tried other treatment methods like medication or timed voiding? If the problem is *only* overactive bladder, it should be controllable by medication in most cases — unless there is some other neurological and/or muscular issue going on. Medications do sometimes have undesirable side effects, but they do work well for many people — so again, it comes down to what is most comfortable for you. Timed voiding (where you urinate on a schedule throughout the day whether you feel the need to go or not– every hour, 90 minutes, 2 hours or whatever your bladder can handle) can also be very helpful in limiting accidents because it keeps your bladder from becoming too full. Certain dietary changes can also help control an overactive bladder in some cases — in particular, caffeine, alcohol, carbonated drinks, diet drinks (with Nutrasweet) and citrus juices can all irritate the bladder and make the spasms worse. If you have a lot of any of these in your diet, try cutting back for a week or two and see if that helps.

You might also consider that one option may be better while you are at work/in public, and another option might be better while you are at home. If fear of having an accident gets in the way of your job or your social life, then the adult diapers may make sense at least until you find another form of treatment (medication, timed voiding, diet) that works better for you. At home you may still want to wear regular underwear because that will keep encouraging you to use the bathroom when you can — which is important, you don’t want to let the diapers become a “crutch” to be used for convenience, especially if the problem turns out to be temporary — and at home, the “danger” of being embarrassed by an accident is much less. There are also intermediate levels of protection (such as pads or “male guards”) that can protect against small leaks while fitting inside your regular underwear and being much less noticeable/intrusive than a full-blown diaper.

Remember, you have nothing to be ashamed of! Good luck in finding something that works for you!

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